Peer Review of Avalon Shea

This is a peer review of Avalon Shea's college essay.

I chose to make a copy-editing suggestion of Avalon's college essay Drug Decriminalization: Dangerous or Desirable for the United States? because I thought that he essay form was good and she could maybe work on her content a little.

I think I helped Avalon by explain how useful and important sources are, especially for a project like this. I know that a ton of people have an opinion on drug decriminalization so it shouldn't be hard to find sources. I thought that her's looked credible, but she only had 3, which isn't enough to prove that decriminalizing drugs is a good idea.

The student's guide talks about sources and author credibility and I just didn't see Avalon's credibility on the subject. She didn't mention any personal stories and I don't know if she is interested in law or what makes her someone who has a fresh take on the topic. I think that if she maybe talks a little about herself, it would be extremely beneficial to her essay.

I liked her topic and I thought her rebuttal was good and clear. She knew her position and he stood proudly and backed it up with facts. I thought that it was a well written essay, but it could be developed a little bit further.